Dating is an activity that many people simply hate. They view it as a necessary evil. The constant meeting of a new person and having to figure out if the person will qualify for a second date. If they do, will there be a third date and so forth. Now as we all know, most of these dates do not work out. There is always something. She lives too far away, he parties too much, we are not on the same career path, he is too short and the list goes on. But you want to find a mate. So in order to find and get to know that person, you must date. Now some folks are fortunate enough to date 1or 2 people before they find their future mate. Unfortunately, for myself and 98% of the single population, this is not the case. We must get out there and date! And since we are out here, we may as well have fun. This is how you enjoy dating.
- You must first embrace the process. Unless you are a part of an arranged marriage or you want to be by yourself for the rest of your life, you must date. Whether you meet someone online, out at a bar, church, through a friend, eventually you have to go on a date if you want to get to know that person. So embrace and learn to look forward to it. This is an opportunity for you to learn and grow. Every woman I have ever dated has always taught me something, whether it be good or bad. I am spending time with a beautiful and intelligent person with different life experiences and viewpoints so at the very least I am learning something. This is not to say every date is good but that I can find something good in every date. So convert your mindset to one of curiosity and you will look forward to every date.
- Relax and be yourself. This is essential in dating. We all want to look as good as possible in the eyes of our dates but the truth is we all have our flaws and imperfections. Nobody is perfect, so don’t try to be. Let conversation flow naturally and be a good listener. You don’t have to agree with everything they say and vice versa. You don’t have to tell everything about you but do not try to be somebody that you are not. It will eventually come out later anyway and you will be deemed a phony and untrustworthy. I usually ask a lot of open ended questions where she can talk about herself and I can give her that back. This usually leads to some mindful and authentic conversation where we normally figure out if there will be a next date or not. But the whole time I am relaxed and engaged because I am being myself.
- Be present. Now I know sometimes you might agree to a date but after thinking about…